Sometimes I hate myself

Sometimes… 

Sometimes I hate myself 

For holding back

Thinking that

I’m not good enough 

Sometimes I loathe myself

For letting past

Great opportunities 

And letting the past

Break free and come screw with me. 

Sometimes I hate myself 

For overthinking

Disbelieving scenarios

Tormented by mental sicarios

Scared to take action

And see how my ideas goes. 

Sometimes I’m angry with me

For caring for nonsense

But deserting care for cents

I’m incensed 

My mind says this

Heart feels that 

Ignores my soul says no. 

I’m mostly happy with myself

For being a junior Martin Luther King 

And believing I have a dream

Even when clouds and storms to me cling. 

I’m very proud of myself

For seeing through the haze

Of mixed emotions yesterday

Failures of my past building me up today

So my future I can calmly face.

I’m astonished by myself

For the accomplishments I’ve made 

And the pain overcome can dissipate 

No longer fazed I said

Pick yourself up

Move

Push and meditate. 

Beating obstacles that levitate

Means wings I grow

Above to fly 

Overcome 

Reach the ceiling and break

Expectations bound to me. 

But now I see

Roadblocks like a dozer go through them

Like a phantom phase through them

with a smile on my face

Embrace and subdue them

Arrows in my back and neck

Walk a head, pull them out and show them

Even in pain, I can still do this

Because best of all

I’m proud of myself 

To push myself

And definitely I beat me to be me. 

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2 thoughts on “Sometimes I hate myself

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